That new car park has been a Godsend for business,” so remarked the owner of a local garage repair a few years ago after a new underground car park opened in the nearby shopping centre. The spaces were so narrow, the bends so difficult to negotiate, the cement pillars so plentiful, the kerbs so high, that he was out the door fixing dents, scrapes and damaged wheels.

“Bang!” My car actually shook. The woman parked alongside me was opening her door. She obviously didn’t know that I was still in my car as she purposefully whacked her door off the side of my car to remove her portly self from the front seat of her SUV.

Go on, admit it. You have used the car beside you as a door stop while squeezing in and out, safe in the knowledge that the owner will never know if you have chipped a lump out of their paintwork. As for the runaway trolleys!

Motorcars are being made bigger and bigger. For example, compare the very first Volkswagen Golf 40 years ago to its modern equivalent and you will see how it has grown in sync with the human body size and shape. But car parking spaces have not been widened or lengthened in lieu of this. Instead, we are left to deftly manoeuvre our cars in and out of the narrowest parking slots, even in the most modern car parks.

Thank God for parking sensors or the “beep beeps” as I call them. I am driving a long time now but off-street parking is not getting any easier. What must it be like for older people, particularly those a little stiffer than myself, trying to get in and out through a door slit you cannot open any more than about 45 degrees wide?

According to the Irish Parking Association, the recommended minimum dimensions for a short stay car parking slot is 2.5 metres by 4.8 metres. It is utterly ridiculous and about time common sense took over. That minimum recommendation should be reviewed to take into consideration the simple fact that cars are getting bigger and in some families, have morphed into MPVs and SUVs.

Commercial businesses will, of course, beg to differ. What shop owner wishes for less parking bays? I would argue that a stress-free parking experience might actually make for happier customers.

But whatever about supermarkets, hospitals or apartment block developers, the man who owns the motor paint shop certainly doesn’t want them widened. CL

Take responsibility for your weight gain

Every so often, shock figures are trotted out about Ireland’s growing obesity problem. Why are people obese? It’s because they don’t eat properly and don’t exercise. Surely those who consistently eat poor food and seldom bother leaving the sofa can’t be that stupid not to realise why they must always go to the XXL section of the clothes shop, can they? We even have TV shows which feel the need to show the difference between nutritious food and takeaways and how regular exercise helps keeps you fit. I can’t help but think of the Father Ted episode where Ted explains to Dougal the reason the cows in the field are the same size as the ones on his farm set. “These are small but the ones out there are far away!” Most of us could do with losing a few more pounds, none of us are perfect. But at least we know what causes weight gain and are willing to get out for a walk or a run, forget about the microwave and do a bit of proper cooking now and again. What has become of taking personal responsibility anymore?