Music festival season is kicking off again where, once again, Ireland’s young (and not-so-young) urban population make their way to various fields around the country to listen to music and get up to all sorts of mischief.

I was reminded of the time of year this week when my city-slicker nephew rang asking for advice on what kind of boots he needed to buy to keep his feet dry for the duration of his expedition outside the pale.

He, in his innocence, didn’t realise the importance of his enquiry. The wellies you wear say a lot about who you are as a person. A solid pair from the co-op usual give the right impression for the full-time farmer. They have to be green. Anything that doesn’t almost reach the knee is next to useless. Any pair with a buckle on the side is a sure sign of notions, and must be avoided unless you want to be laughed out of the mart.

Those plastic things that cost a few quid are great for making your feet sweat and have the unique trait of having no grip on either grass, stone or mud.

He responded to all this hard-earned knowledge with a question: “What’s a co-op”?

I hope the weather stays fine for him.