I read your advice every week and I hope you can help me with what may seem a trivial issue, but it’s been bugging me for weeks and I wanted to get your take on the situation.

My husband and I and our three kids have been joining extended family on a camping holiday every summer for the past number of years. We opt for one of the many summer festivals around the country and have seen some amazing acts, as well as some of the most gorgeous parts of Ireland, for three or four nights under the canvas. It’s the one weekend I know my husband will make sure he has cover for the farm as he really enjoys the chilled nature of the break, where the three families become one big happy group.

The problem I have is my sister has announced she’s invited a friend of hers along this year, with her husband and two kids and I’m afraid this new addition will upset the lovely dynamic we’ve enjoyed up until now. This couple seem lovely – I don’t know them very well – but I’m not sure how it will work bringing new people into what has been a very relaxed and easy arrangement. In the past, we’ve taken turns with cooking and babysitting the smaller kids, and while I’m hoping this family are willing to go along with a tried and tested formula, I have my doubts.

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I don’t want to be awkward about it but maybe I’m being selfish because I’m afraid if things change, it’ll be harder to get my husband away for a few days. It took enough convincing back when we took our first trip as a big gang, but if this new family upset the apple cart, I’m afraid it could cost me the one weekend of the year we really look forward to.

A worried mother,

North Tipperary

Dear reader,

I’m very jealous reading your letter as I think it’s a wonderful idea to take off with the kids to a festival for the weekend, and to share that with your wider family is creating very precious memories every year.

I also understand your apprehension at the prospect of a new group entering the scene, particularly when they are not family. I also detect a note of frustration that you have with your sister for issuing the invitation without speaking to you or the other families concerned.

The fact of the matter is not many of us like change. Especially when the current situation has worked so well for everyone. But there is the possibility that the introduction of this family will inject a new energy into the group, and that could be a good thing.

It will potentially bring new friends for the children, as well as the men folk. But I do appreciate your apprehension if there’s a chance your sister and her friend break away from the bigger group.

Have a chat with your sister about the upcoming trip and say how much you’re looking forward to another year of festival fun. You could also ask if this other family have been camping before and let that lead you into a conversation about whether or not this lady is happy to muck in with you all, given how well things have worked down through the years. This could ease your concerns.

Do you have a problem you would like to share? If so, write in confidence to: Dear Miriam, Agony Aunt, Irish Country Living, Irish Farmers Journal, Irish Farm Centre, Bluebell, Dublin 12, or email miriam@farmersjournal.ie