The rain was beating down and a heavy mist settled over the Hodson Bay hotel so that the beautiful Lough Ree could barely be seen. It was the perfect day to pour a hot cup of tea, bite into a scone smothered in jam and have a chat with Mary O’Rourke.

Interviewing Mary isn’t really like an interview. Although we’ve never met before, it was like a catchup with an old friend and we felt right at home in the Hodson Bay. In fact, once it was her home.

“My parents managed the hotel right through my teenage years, it was quite an idyllic place to grow up. Back then it was completely different, it only had 12 rooms – it was what you would call a boutique hotel today.”

Growing up on the shores of Lough Ree is mentioned several times in Mary’s newest book, Letters of My Life. A collection of 20 letters, some to people she has never met and others to her nearest and dearest, it is an endearing read that gives us a snapshot into some of the most important times of her life and her opinions on love and, of course, politics.

A Lifetime of Friendship

Friendship, however, is one of the most poignant elements and for anyone who has loved and lost a great friend, Mary’s letter to Nuala Loftus will tug at your heartstrings.

“Nuala was my best friend growing up. When we were 12 or 13, when the world was opening up, we would whisper our secrets and we swore our friendship would be true forever. We were so close and when I married Enda, she was my bridesmaid. But life was busy and like so many people we drifted. There was no rift, life just got in the way. Then earlier in the summer, I tracked Nuala down. I’m so happy to have her back in my life and we have promised not to drift again. For some reason, that story touches a lot of people who have read the book. I think so many had that childhood friend, that bond, and we often think about them or wonder what happened.”

Due to her busy political career, Mary says she didn’t amass a huge amount of friends but was so lucky to have her sister-in-law Ann Lenihan.

“I remember when Ann married my brother Brian in 1958, she was the belle of Athlone – gorgeous, bright and spirited – and we got on from the very start. Ann was such a stalwart to Brian in his political endeavours and our kids were the same age and grew up together, so we had many things in common – a lifetime of memories.”

The letter beautifully captures a friendship that stood the test of time, and is even more poignant as Ann passed away just last month.

“Dear Ann, I am so happy she got to read the book before she died. She rang me the morning after the launch and, of course, being modest, said there was no need [to be writing about her]. I said to her: “There was a need and thank you for the years of friendship.” We had a lovely moment, a memory to cherish, which is comforting as I really will miss her.”

Women in Politics

Of course, Mary’s great love of politics shines through. She writes about the importance of the Athlone Fianna Fáil Women’s Group and her appreciation for Mo Mowlam and the work she did in Northern Ireland. However, it is in her letter to former Fianna Fáil Minister Ray McSharry that she really gives us a glimpse into her time as the only female cabinet member.

“It was 1987 and I was the Minister for Education – a rookie at the time in a minority government that barely got in. Charlie Haughey was Taoiseach and Ray McSharry was Minister for Finance. Desperate cuts had to be made and education was no different. There was a proposal called 20/87 to increase classroom sizes by three pupils. I knew it would cause absolute mayhem but it was a cabinet decision.

“There was a Fianna Fáil parliamentary party meeting and a motion was put down condemning this dreadful 20/87 and, one, by one, deputies stood up to condemn this motion, as if any sensible Minister for Education would want to increase classroom sizes. I was been thrown to the wolves and my position was on the line.

“Until it came to one moment when Ray got to his feet and said: “Hold on now. We are in the Valley of Death in regards to the economic future of the country. Mary did not invent 20/87 herself. She was implementing a cabinet decision and the idea she brought it in as a wilful act of her own is completely erroneous. Isn’t that so, Taoiseach?” There was complete silence while Charlie Haughey nodded obediently: “That is so Minister, that is so.”

“Now, Ray McSharry had his own reasons for saying what he did but for me it wasn’t just someone standing up for me, it was recognition and public respect for a woman in politics – such a rarity in those days. I learned that day that everybody needs to stand on their own two feet but also everyone needs to have someone take their side every now and then.”

Life at Home

Mary says when it comes to life in general, she was intensely lucky because her husband Enda was always on her side.

“My lovely Enda – he was a great man, quite unique in the sense that back then it was rare for the wife to be the public figure with the career. I remember things getting really busy for me in the Dáil and one evening we sat down and he said: “Are you serious about your job? Do you want to continue in political life?” I replied that I was and he said: “Well, you can’t be racing up and down that road to Dublin every day. I can be mum and dad during the week and when you come home on Thursday night, you can be mum again.”

I remember being so worried and feeling guilt, especially as Aenghus was going through those troublesome teenage years and himself and Enda were clashing. Before I went off every Monday, I made a big roast chicken to tide them over. However, when I came back the chicken would be barely touched. I pulled Aenghus aside who revealed: “Actually mum, most nights Enda takes us to the Chinese.” And that’s where they really bonded – it’s funny how situations work out.”

When Enda did pass away in 2001, Mary says there were times when she didn’t think she would ever emerge from the darkness.

“It was a very sad time but what really gave me hope, what gave me life again, was my grandchildren. I remember looking at Jennifer, this beautiful baby girl, and thinking how lovely it was that I would get to see her grow up, learn to walk and talk, and go to school, and make mistakes, and fall in love. It gave me hope, something to look forward to – my six grandchildren have brought me so much joy and happiness. I didn’t think in those dark days that there was still so much to enjoy. Writing this book in my 80th year, I am glad to say I am not just looking back, which is a feature of old age, I am very much living in the present and looking forward.”

Letters of my Life is available in all good bookshops. Published by Gill Books. CL