“Amiiiiiiiii, what are you doing in hospital? You look absolutely fine on Instagram!!”

“Didn’t know you had back problems, you are always so lively.”

These are examples of some of the messages I received following my surgery last week. Operation three on my herniated L5/S1 disc. I am hoping that “third time lucky” will fix it and that the Instagram persona can become a permanent state. I can’t say that I was surprised by the comments. Social media only paints a small bit of the picture and does not reflect the full reality. In general, people will post nice pictures, good memories and not the flip side of the coin. That no-man’s-land between perception and reality needs to be taken with a pinch of salt. As our picture editor Philip Doyle says, a photograph is “just a snapshot in time”.

Why is Instagram so enthralling? Because imagery can elicit a response from a number of our human senses and emotions. Look at the picture of Vicky Phelan on page 5 – I bet it stirs an emotion in you. And when you look at Siobhán Walsh’s picture on page 6, I bet you can imagine the feeling of salt water and sand between your toes. Pictures are vital to Irish Country Living and it is a shame that we can noramlly only print a small number of the images that are shot. This is why I asked Philip to pull together some of the best imagery from the paper over the last number of years. He writes that “behind every image there is a conversation, an understanding, an empathy and, often, a cup of tea and a biscuit”. That biscuit is a testament to our photographers, as is the number of times we get asked for copies of the pictures afterwards. I asked him to think “iconic” and I think that he has captured that vision perfectly.

To give my body the best chance of recovery, I need to avoid lifting. In fact, my recovery is based on doing little or nothing. And in episodes one and two of Amii’s back odyssey I found that almost impossible to do. Furthermore, I find “doing nothing” detrimental to my head health, which I value on par with the bodily health. Ironically, COVID-19, is actually helpful in this regard. I am in a better place this time psychologically, because there is nothing happening. There is nothing I am meant to be doing, and nothing that I really have to do, that I cannot do.

This year we have produced a lot of content in support of people’s mental health. Given my own current challenges and the need to think about what is happening in my own head, I must say that I got a lot from an article this week in terms of understanding others. Brian Murphy, who works in our production team, sent me this piece some weeks back and I have already read it many, many times. I like to help people, but I am tactile. Doing something for someone or giving advice has been my “help” modus operandi. However, this is of no real value to someone suffering from a mental health issue. While it may be well meaning, any sentence that starts with: “I know how you feel, when I did such and such...” or “You know what I would do...” is completely useless. I am very guilty of this.

Our Desperate Farmwife this week speaks about starting New Year’s resolutions immediately, not waiting. My resolution, which started when I read Brian’s piece, is to close my mouth, open my ears and listen when needed.

Happy New Year to all our readers.

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