It’s Brussels’ bureaucracy gone mad.

Let me tell you what’s speeding down the European tracks. It’s yet another example of EU legislation gone totally crazy.

Brussels has been keeping this bird-brained scheme very quiet but soon you will be hearing about it. But it may be too late.

The Brits broke out of Brussels before the lunatics took over the asylum.

Proposed legislation

It appears a German Green Party member of the European Parliament is proposing legislation for the protection of corvids (that’s crows to you and me) and their roosts.

Heinrich Von Beilinstein-Sstauffencchiken (try telling this to an Offaly garda after a few pints in Rhode) is the man behind this proposal and a member for the Volpertal region in Bavaria. Apparently, the fledgling Volpertal crows are being killed by speeding BMWs and Porsches. And crows who escape being flattened into Pirelli pancakes are shot by farmers.

It’s absolute madness and is, effectively, planning permission notices for crows

His proposed legislation decrees that landowners who have rookeries on their land must erect roadside signage on the first of March every year to inform road users that crows will soon be building nests and to reduce speed to 20km/h when passing within 2km of the rookery.

It’s absolute madness and is, effectively, planning permission notices for crows. It will also be a criminal offence to shoot crows at any time of the year. But it gets worse.

This Green MEP, who apparently has widespread backing from fellow Greens, is also proposing that landowners with rookeries must do an annual census on 1 May, whereby the rookery trees must be climbed and an egg count taken. Then you take a selfie at the nest and send it as proof to a dedicated GLAS section in the Department of Agriculture.

I hope you tell your local MEP how crazy this scheme is

And worse still, failure to partake in this Crow Protection Scheme (CROPRO for short) will mean a 50% cut in payments under the new EU 2023 scheme, which could be drastic.

I wouldn’t be too worried about this. Instead of getting a total annual BPS payment of €100 (full-time tillage farmer, over forty, east of the Shannon), you’ll end up with just a €50 fine.

I hope you tell your local MEP how crazy this scheme is. I’m reliably informed that it’s estimated Irish crows eat more Irish grain than Irish dairy cows. We have to be permitted to shoot them – and maybe a few cows as well.

Tillage

As we have some grassland that is suited to tillage, Minister McConalogue’s new Tillage Incentive Scheme suits us very well. I’ve sprayed off a 35 acre field which we will shortly plough for barley.

The planned spring barley (Skyway) was sown last weekend

With suitable land, this scheme is an attractive one and will be better than feeding store bullocks for a beef price that falls away behind the costs escalation.

It’s said that March dust is worth a pound an ounce or a king’s ransom.

The planned spring barley (Skyway) was sown last weekend (26 March) in superb conditions, mostly into traditional ploughed seedbeds.

For the first time in years, we have no beans sown due to rotational reasons. But next year, beans will be back with a bang, not least because of the crazy nitrogen costs which look like remaining for some time.

Speaking of nitrogen, the final split will go on the oilseed rape shortly

This year, we have not really been fully exposed to expensive fertiliser due to early purchasing. Speaking of nitrogen, the final split will go on the oilseed rape shortly, as it will soon be too tall for accurate spreading. But it’s not half as tall as the April fool’s tale I told you about the crows.