Did you ever try to shave yourself while listening to a match at the same time?
You invariably end up looking like an extra from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
Indeed, The Dealer’s good wife has banned the radio from the bathroom on health and safety grounds after the mop and bucket was needed to clean the place after a few particularly close contests.
It’s a pity she didn’t extend the ban to the tractor, such was the hames The Dealer made of knocking the neighbour’s hay on Sunday. To say the mowing was messy would be a grievous abuse of the English language.
The field looked like it had been cut in reverse.
There was nearly as much hay left standing as there was knocked, and the weave of the rows was enough to entice headaches or hallucinations.
The Dealer could have blamed the mower, but the real culprit was RTÉ Radio’s Sunday Sport.
The drama from the hurling championships in Leinster and Munster was spellbinding, as first the fortunes of Wexford, Westmeath and Dublin ebbed and flowed, and then the contests in Limerick and Thurles captivated listeners.
The wise decision to abandon ship was taken after Horgan and Hutchinson bagged those late goals and The Dealer suddenly realised he was mowing the back-stroke for the third time.
Clearly, hurling and hay should not be mixed.