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Dear Miriam,
I have been part of the local sports club and a few years ago I joined the committee. It has been great, I have felt really involved in the community and it’s been a good social outlet. After a few years on the committee, I was asked to become secretary. I was very hesitant. I thought it would be too much of a time strain as I have a full-time job, three kids and my husband is running the farm, but I still agreed to help out.
The problem is though that the committee want me to stay on for another term. I am a very organised person and many people compliment that I have done a great job
It certainly has been busy, but I have enjoyed it, despite my hesitations. At the same time, I have now served my term doing the voluntary role and was looking forward to stepping down and getting a bit more free time. I feel I have served my time.
The problem is though that the committee want me to stay on for another term. I am a very organised person and many people compliment that I have done a great job. I also know there is no one that is very strong to fill the position. I don’t want to leave the club down, especially as all my kids are very much involved. At the same time, I want a bit more time to myself to relax and enjoy more time at home.
Yours sincerely,
Clare Reader
Dear Clare Reader,
Thank you for your letter. Life certainly sounds busy; I’m exhausted just reading your letter! But despite your commitments at home, work and on the farm, you are obviously very community-orientated and have done your best to give back through the local club.
Having been involved with committees myself in the past, I know just how demanding the role of secretary can be.
The problem with trying to please everybody else is that you often end up neglecting one person in the process: yourself. And that will rarely end well in the long run
It’s a great credit to you that you stepped up when asked – despite your initial hesitation – and you have obviously proven to be very capable in the position. Little wonder then that your fellow committee members would love you to stay on for another year.
However, the problem with trying to please everybody else is that you often end up neglecting one person in the process: yourself. And that will rarely end well in the long run.
It seems to me that you have done your bit and now it is somebody else’s turn to step up. I know you mention your concern that there is nobody very strong to fill the position, but at the end of the day, none of us are irreplaceable.
This may be an opportunity for the committee to draft in new blood from the community, or to give another person the encouragement to step forward. If you think about it, the committee and club functioned before you came on board and even if you stayed on for another year, they would still have to find your replacement in 12 months’ time anyway. So that might help put things into perspective in terms of prioritising the need to look after yourself right now.
What might ease the transition for all concerned, however, could be if you maybe offered to “mentor” the new secretary for the first few weeks, explain how you have organised your system, maybe make a list of the key tasks etc, if they wanted that helping hand? I’m not sure if you still plan to stay involved in the committee or if you want a complete break, but there are also other roles that carry a lot less responsibility, but where you can still give back if you want to keep the connection while the kids are still involved etc rather than sever ties completely.
At the end of the day, I think you know in your heart what is right for you. I would be very clear in stating that while you have enjoyed your time as secretary and it has been a privilege to serve, you need to step back now for personal reasons, but would be happy to help the new person to find their feet or still contribute to the club in other ways. Best of luck and enjoy your well earned break.
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